Where's all this going?

A framework that helped reshape my direction in the age of AI

Every so often, I rebrand my Substack. This time, the rebranding is really for myself as I mark a new period of my life. My posts will continue to be about AI, but what I focus on and how I share my views is taking a different turn. Here is the story, without using an LLM to create AI slop.

Six years ago, I was packing for a sabbatical in China. My plan was to be a visiting professor at Southwest University in Chongqing -- a place that I consider my second hometown. Well, then COVID happened. And the sabbatical I had planned never happened. Instead, I spent the time in lockdown making the best of the experience. I learned Python programming to go deep into text analysis, while converting my backyard into an urban farm. I enjoyed what I created, making the best of the situation. I was satisfied with the sabbatical, but still a bit disappointed.

My unplanned sabbatical project of 2020.

This year, I have another shot at a sabbatical. This is probably my last one, and I really wanted it to be significant. My plan was to launch my sabbatical with the trip that was lost to COVID. I would return to China and then visit some new places. Everything was perfect. I was wrapping up my academic obligations while dropping into my workshop to make a few things. I love making things, similar to how I work with data. I love the challenge of taking raw materials (e.g., data or wood) and creating something unique (e.g., knowledge or functional art). But a tornado rumbled through Ann Arbor, leaving me with a flooded home that insurance wouldn’t cover. So, my tools, time, and skills shifted from creative projects to tasks that I don’t enjoy.

I finally got my house put back together, giving me a window of time to balance my sabbatical travel plans with getting back to my projects in my workshop. But time was slipping away, and I was losing momentum and interest in my travels, my projects, and life in general. The launch into my sabbatical had become a comedy of errors.

The big question

Everything went on hold while I went to St. Louis to attend a doctoral defense. At the last moment, I reached out to an extremely talented and accomplished professor, Peter Boumgarden. He is well known for his work in organizational strategy and executive leadership. We met over 20 years ago in a structural equation modeling course and have remained loosely connected since. I feel fortunate that he found some time for a one-on-one with me.

After a warm greeting, Peter referred to my writing about AI and asked, “Brian, where do you see all of this going?” I was surprised on two accounts. First, is somebody actually reading what I wrote?! More significantly, the question was presented with intent. What is the intent behind all those keystrokes? My life has been at a pace that I haven’t been able to focus on this type of question. I admitted I didn’t know, but I really wanted this sabbatical to give me time to figure it out.

A framework for understanding

I’m certain that Peter knew I was stuck. He dropped into his expert role, where he excels at being an advisor, coach, and friend. He shared with me an activity he uses in his leadership training to bring some organization to my racing, scattered thoughts. He encouraged me to think about things that I wanted to accelerate in life; to go deeper and be more productive. To think about new activities that are adjacent to my core. And finally, to identify alternatives—activities that are completely different from what I am doing.

At the moment, I wished he could have just given me the answers. But I know that the real work was my own burden. The more I thought about his questions, the more I realized that the measures of success and happiness in my life were entirely wrong. I was benchmarking my own activities in the same way I was benchmarking AI models. But the benchmarks for myself were entirely wrong. I wasn’t approaching my sabbatical trip with intentions that would help set the next period of my life. The creative projects were tasks and deliverables. The pace of my work and my life was no longer manageable, and I was producing simply for the sake of producing.

AI, which is supposed to make life easier and more manageable, was actually making me busier. Even the messages that I received were tokens generated by an LLM. The authenticity was gone. AI is truly a disruptive technology.

Benchmarking the Alternative

I’m still going to use my sabbatical trip to think carefully about what to accelerate and what can be adjacent. But, for now, I have really come to understand what my new alternative is. The creative process is not about optimizing for speed and accuracy, but about discovery, finding inspiration, and exploring the decision space. I need to focus on the process, not the outcome. That is what I was missing.

I sent Peter a text message asking, “What comes after accelerate and adjacent?” A few minutes later, he confirmed it was “alternative.” My alternative for the next stage of my life is really about going back to my desire to create. I started my college experience as an art student, and that is where I want to return. A different style, a different medium, but an opportunity to create.

I returned to my workshop to find my unfinished projects. I dusted them off and quickly saw the imperfections in the projects and in myself.

I was ready to throw them away because I knew they would not have any value. But doing so would be reinforcing my old benchmarks. In the same way I dusted off projects, I dusted off the tools and focused on the process. I discovered some new techniques and was pleased that some imperfections were interesting features. They didn’t turn out to be my best pieces, but I learned a lot. This offered both a sense of closure on my old ways of working and renewed inspiration and motivation.

What’s next?

I still need to give the accelerate-adjacent-alternative framework more thought, but I have made considerable progress in one area. I have been working around the clock in my workshop with a sense of motivation and purpose that has been absent from my work. I’ve taken a few short breaks to finish planning my sabbatical trip, knowing exactly what I want to see and why.

Moving forward, I am committed to matching every bit of academic work with creative activities, with benchmarks focused on process rather than outcomes. With the right process, I know that right outcomes will follow. I’m ready to depart for China. Usually, I bring manuscripts and teaching materials. This time, I have gifts that I have created for my friends. I’m still developing my skills – they aren’t perfect, but I thoroughly enjoyed the process.

Bon voyage!